Blooming Blessings

Life as a new mom is quite an exciting adventure, and as my little daughter and baby son grow up, I can't even begin to express the amount of joy I feel as they learn about and discover the world around them.  Their gorgeous smiles and twinkling eyes are more than enough payment for all of the hard work I put in each day as their Mama.  Of course, as I write this, they are peacefully sleeping.  In less than an hour, they'll both be awake, I'll be busy making snacks and changing diapers, sister will be trying to shove cheerios in to her dear brother's protesting mouth, and I can guarantee that I will be re-thinking the intro to this post altogether! It goes without saying, things are definitely not always gorgeous smiles and twinkling eyes.

Luckily, I've had front row tickets to a father-daughter show that is very close to my heart, and it has taught me a lot about the trials and tribulations that go hand-in-hand with parenthood.  The 'show' I'm referring to is that of my brother and his (almost) five-year-old daughter. Last week, I phoned him for some parenting advice; namely, what he dealt with during the elusive Terrible Twos. Our conversation lasted for a couple of hours and really got me thinking about a list that my husband and I mentally drafted up during my first pregnancy. The list included all of the things that we would NEVER do once our daughter was born. You know the list? It was teeming with the unthinkable, among them...*shudder*...TV watching and candy eating. Heaven forbid!! I am pleased to announce that we have since come back down to earth, and have scratched almost every single 'forbidden' item off of our list along the way. 

That said, being a parent is awash with judgement:  Do you have the right gear?  Is your diaper bag stocked with the best supplies?  Do you use cloth diapers?  Are they organic?  Do you breast feed?  What kind of carrier do you have? Are you aware of the benefits of baby wearing? When are you going to start offering solids? Do you let him watch TV?  How often, and for how long? What social programs are you involved in? Do you allow your child treats? Do you limit sugar? How much dairy?  Do you, have you, will you???

When my daughter was born, I bought into all of the judgmental drama and tried to do everything perfectly, all the time.  My daughter had the best clothes, the best developmental toys and games, was involved in baby music class and baby yoga.  I didn't offer her solids until the exact day she turned 6-months-old, and I didn't turn on the television for her to watch for months after that. I felt judged by my parents, my in-laws, even my husband, and I've come to the conclusion that I felt so judged because I was such a judgmental new mom. I took great pride in doing everything as it was exactly recommended by doctors and professionals, and I spent a lot of time worrying that I would mess up somewhere along the way. It's almost funny for me to look back on now that my second child is in his fourth month.  He's already had solids, he's not involved in any extra-curricular activities, he sometimes wears his sister's hand-me-downs, and he's pretty much the happiest and most relaxed baby I have ever met.

I wish I could somehow turn back the hands of time knowing what I know now: babies are fueled on care, and care alone. It's really that simple. And now that my daughter has kicked in the figurative door leading to the dreaded Terrible Twos, I'm going to take my own advice, as it seems to resonate across the board throughout the toddler years:

Do what you feel in your heart.  Take good care, and your family will thrive...